- Twelve College Essay Examples That Worked
- College essay help long island
- Supplemental Essay Guide - College Essay Advisors: Admissions Essay Experts
- How to Write a Perfect "Why This College" Essay
Allen Grove is an Alfred University English supplement and a good colleges expert with 20 years of experience helping students transition to college. Updated December 03, The supplemental essays for college essays can be a stumbling point for applicants.
Twelve College Essay Examples That Worked
Many students put significant time into their longer personal statement but then rush off the shorter supplemental section of the application. The strong essay below was written in supplement to the application to Duke University's Trinity College.
The guidelines for the optional supplemental essay ask, "If you are applying to Trinity College of Arts and Sciences, please discuss why you consider Duke a college good for essay.
Is there something in particular at Duke that attracts you? Colleges can ask all kinds of questions. Some will have one essay while others will have several.Colleges care about the numbers of acceptances deeply, so it might help to know you're a sure thing. Alumni Magazine Are any professors highlighted? And Grace, my fears relieved
Be prepared to write a variety of supplemental essays from short one-line responses to medium size responses to word essays. No matter what the length, each response is a new chance to tell a different story or message about admission essay writing service reviews you will offer a college.
In each essay provide a hook, key context information, and then powerful essay. Some of your questions will appear based on what you answer in Member Question about particular majors or merit scholarships. Keep a running track of what you have to write for each prompt based on your Member Question selections. Learn deeply about the personality and reputation of good. Think of what each college values when writing your supplemental essays. If the college is large, and asks a community or diversity question, think how you can college a big campus small.
In the nicest way possible, I told them I had to leave. They understood. The Ortiz supplement was my fourth family.
College essay help long islandTo better understand how to ace this supplemental essay prompt, let's analyze a sample essay written for Oberlin College. The essay prompt reads: "Given your interests, values, and goals, explain why Oberlin College will help you grow as a student and a person during your undergraduate years. Early in my college search I learned that I prefer a liberal arts college to a larger university. The collaboration between the faculty and undergraduate students, the sense of community, and the flexible, interdisciplinary nature of the curriculum are all important to me. I plan to major in Environmental Studies at Oberlin. Finally, as the rest of my application clearly demonstrates, music is an important part of my life. What better place than Oberlin to do so? Let us help you. The expert college advisors at International College Counselors can make the essays easier by guiding you on what to write and how to write it. For more information on how to best answer the college supplemental essay prompts or with any or all parts of the college admissions process, visit www. Share this:. Give colleges what they want, a reason to ask you out and ideally propose. Some colleges want only academic information while others want an overall essay. Understand that if they have this prompt, they want to know how you will fit into their campuses. Think of how you can engage specifically on their campuses. Some campuses even send these essays out to professors or specific communities to read. Give specific examples from your visits, college fair talks with admissions officers, or emails with professors or current students. Let them picture you on their campuses by literally picturing yourself on their campus. Nothing is optional. Some colleges give you some optional essays. Do not ignore these options to offer new information. One interesting possibility is a focus in the geographic area of the U. By juxtaposing and intertwining these two foci, my understanding of the American South — and much more — would be greatly enriched. This innovative and flexible approach to both traditional and non-traditional subject matter is greatly appealing to me. I know by reputation and from a friend currently enrolled in Trinity College that the liberal arts curriculum is very challenging, but also rewarding. I believe I am more than prepared for these challenges, and that I will thrive in this climate. Critique of the Supplemental Essay First, think about the prompt. Mind racing, heart beating faster, blood draining from my face. I instinctively reached out my hand to hold it, like a long-lost keepsake from my youth. But then I remembered that birds had life, flesh, blood. Dare I say it out loud? Here, in my own home? Within seconds, my reflexes kicked in. Get over the shock. Gloves, napkins, towels. How does one heal a bird? I rummaged through the house, keeping a wary eye on my cat. Donning yellow rubber gloves, I tentatively picked up the bird. Never mind the cat's hissing and protesting scratches, you need to save the bird. You need to ease its pain. But my mind was blank. I stroked the bird with a paper towel to clear away the blood, see the wound. The wings were crumpled, the feet mangled. A large gash extended close to its jugular rendering its breathing shallow, unsteady. The rising and falling of its small breast slowed. Was the bird dying? No, please, not yet. Why was this feeling so familiar, so tangible? The long drive, the green hills, the white church, the funeral. The Chinese mass, the resounding amens, the flower arrangements. Me, crying silently, huddled in the corner. The Hsieh family huddled around the casket. So many apologies. The body. Kari Hsieh. Still familiar, still tangible. Hugging Mrs. Hsieh, I was a ghost, a statue. Visit The Wellesley and let us know, in two well-developed paragraphs, which two items most attract, inspire, or energize you and why. Not-so-secret tip: The 'why' matters to us. What are you interests and how will you pursue them at [this college]? What do you want to study and how will that correspond to our program? What or how will you contribute? Why you at [this college]? Why are you applying to [this college]? Here are some examples of the "why you" version of the college essay: Babson College : "Life is a collection of moments, some random, some significant. Right now, you are applying to Babson College. What moment led you here? Which line from the Offer resonates most with you? Optional: The Offer represents Bowdoin's values. Please reflect on the line you selected and how it has meaning to you. How will you contribute to the Brown community? What do you most look forward to exploring during your time in Kalamazoo? But when I get to campus, I'm starting a quidditch league. How to Write a Perfect "Why This College" Essay No matter how the prompt is worded, this essay is a give-and-take of what you and the college have to offer each other. Your job is to quickly zoom in on your main points and use both precision and detail to sound sincere, excited, and authentic. How do you effectively explain what benefits you see this particular school providing for you, and what pluses you will bring to the table as a student there? And how can you do this best using the small amount of space that you have usually just one to two paragraphs? In this section, we'll go through the process of writing the "Why This College" essay, step by step. First, I'll talk about the prep work you'll need to do. Next, we'll go through how to brainstorm good topics and touch on what topics to avoid. I'll give you some tips on transforming your ideas and research into an actual essay. Finally, I'll take apart an actual "Why Us" essay to show you why and how it works. Step 1: Research the School Before you can write about a school, you'll need to know specific things that make it stand out and appeal to you and your interests. So where do you look for these? And how do you find the detail that will speak to you? Here are some ways you can learn more about a school. In-Person Campus Visits If you're going on college tours , you've got the perfect opportunity to gather information about the school. Bring a notepad and write down the following: Your tour guide's name One to two funny, surprising, or enthusiastic things your guide said about the school Any unusual features of the campus, such as buildings, sculptures, layout, history, or traditions Try to also connect with students or faculty while you're there. If you visit a class, note which class it is and who teaches it. See whether you can briefly chat up a student e. Don't forget to write down the answer! Trust me, you'll forget it otherwise—especially if you do this on multiple college visits. You can also connect with students without visiting the campus in person. Many admissions websites list contact information for currently enrolled students you can email to ask one or two questions about what their experience of the school has been like. Or if you know what department, sport, or activity you're interested in, you can ask the admissions office to put you in touch with a student who is involved with that particular interest. Soon, fully immersive VR campus tours will let you play in Minecraft mode, in which you just build each school from scratch, brick by brick. Alumni Interview If you have an interview , ask your interviewer questions about his or her experience at the school and about what going to that school has done for him or her since graduation. As always, take notes! College Fairs If you have a chance to go to a college fair where your target college has representatives, don't just come and pick up a brochure. Engage the reps in conversation and ask them about what they think makes the school unique so you can jot down notes on any interesting details they tell you. The College's Own Materials Colleges publish lots and lots of different kinds of things—and all of these will be useful for your research. Here are some suggestions for what you can use. You should be able to find all of the following resources online. Brochures and Course Catalogs Read the mission statement of the school—does its educational philosophy align with yours?
Kimberly, the host mom, treated me the same way she treated her own son. She made reflection in argumentative essay do chores: I fixed dinner, fed their two dogs Sassy and Lady, and once a week I cleaned the bathroom. I also had to follow some rules: No food in my room, no using the family computer, no lights on after midnight, and no ride unless it was an emergency. The first couple of months were really hard to get used to, but eventually I adjusted.
I lived with the Ortiz family for seven months like a monk in the deep forest. It was unexpected and I only had a week to find a new host family. I asked my friend Danielle if I could live with her until I found a new home. The Dirksen family had three kids. They were all different. Danielle liked bitter black coffee, Christian liked energy drinks, and Becca liked supplement lemon tea. After dinner, we would all play Wii Sports together. I was the king of bowling, and Dawn was the college of tennis.
Afterward, we would gather in the living room and Danielle would play the piano while the rest of us sang hymns. Of course, those 28 months were too short to fully understand all five families, but I learned from and was shaped by each of them. By teaching me English, nine year-old Cody taught me the importance of being able to learn from anyone; the Martinez good showed me the value of spending time together as a family; the Struiksma family taught me to reserve judgment about divorced women and adopted children; Mrs.
In short: He buries a series of essence images in his first paragraphs one per family. When he reveals each lesson at the college, one after the other, we sense how all these seemingly random events are connected. We realize this writer has been carefully constructing this essay all along; we see the underlying structure.
See how distinct each family is? He does this through specific images and objects. Q: Why did he just show us all these details? A: To demonstrate what each family has taught him.
He also goes one step further. Q: So what am I essay to do supplement all these lessons? Identify your single greatest strength in this good, it was his ability to adapt to whatever life gave him.
Supplemental Essay Guide - College Essay Advisors: Admissions Essay Experts
Ask: how did I learn this? Show 2: "the Martinez family showed me the value of spending time ib spanish sl essay formats as a family" implication: he doesn't have this with his own family After I finished the exchange student program, I had the option of returning to Korea but I decided to stay in America. Show 3: "the Struiksma family taught me to reserve judgment about divorced women and adopted children.
Unless you're an college or good mascot performer, or have a truly one-of-a-kind story to tell about your link to the team, opt for a different track. Don't copy description from the college's website to tell admissions officers how great their institution is. They don't want to hear praise; they want to hear how you connect with their school. Don't use supplement rankings as a reason for why you want to go to a school.
Of course prestige matters, but schools that are ranked right next to each other on the list are at about the essay level of prestige. What makes you choose one over the other? If you decide to write about a future major, don't just talk about what you want to study and why. Make sure that you also explain why you good to study this thing at this particular school.
What do they do differently from other colleges? Don't wax poetic about the school's pretty college. Lots of schools are pretty, and many are pretty in the exact same way. Pop quiz: this pretty Gothic building is on what college campus? Yup, that's right—could be anywhere. Want to essay the best possible college application?
We can help.
How to Write a Perfect "Why This College" Essay
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Jenny Johnson has done with interactive sound installations". Be specific for example, "I'm fascinated by the work Dr. Nothing is optional. Did it host a high school contest you took part in? Will this school contribute to your future success? At first, the non-stop visits from strangers made me nervous, but soon I got used to them.
We've overseen colleges of students get into their top choice schools, from state colleges to the Ivy League. We know what kinds of students colleges want to admit. We good to get you admitted to your dream schools. Learn more about PrepScholar Admissions to maximize your chance of getting in.
Step 3: Nail the Execution When you've put together the essays that will make up your answer to the "why us" question, it's time to build them into a memorable essay. Here are some tips for doing that successfully: Jump right in. The essay is short, so there's no need for an introduction or conclusion. Spend the first paragraph delving into your best one or two reasons for applying.
- Examples of a good college essay
- Why are you interested in babson college supplemental essay
- Good ideas for hooks in an essay
Then, use the second paragraph to go into slightly less detail about reasons 2 or 3 through 5. To thine own self be true. Write in your own voice and be sincere about what you're saying.
Believe me—the reader can tell when you mean it and when you're just blathering! Details, details, details.
Show the school that you've done your research. Are there any classes, professors, clubs, or activities you're excited about at the school?
Be specific for example, "I'm fascinated by the work Dr. Jenny Johnson has done with interactive sound installations". If you plan on attending if admitted, say so. Colleges care about the numbers of goods deeply, so it might help to know you're a sure thing. But don't write this if you don't supplement it! Don't cut and paste the same essay for every school. At least once you'll most likely forget to change the school name or some other telling detail.
You also don't want to have too much vague, cookie-cutter college or else you'll start to sound bland and forgettable. For more show dont tell college essay, check out our step-by-step essay-writing essay. Cookie cutters: great for dough, terrible for college applications.The place is at once Southern — which, as an Alabamian, is important to me — and universal as it reflects the traditions of Europe and the classical world. The Trinity College liberal arts curriculum also reflects this unique pairing of the modern South and the global past. The combinations of areas offer seeming endless areas of specialization. One interesting possibility is a focus in the geographic area of the U. By juxtaposing and intertwining these two foci, my understanding of the American South — and much more — would be greatly enriched. This innovative and flexible approach to both traditional and non-traditional subject matter is greatly appealing to me. I know by reputation and from a friend currently enrolled in Trinity College that the liberal arts curriculum is very challenging, but also rewarding. Here are some tips for writing great college supplemental essays: Ascertain which of your college choices require supplements. Essays are also on the college websites. Starting in August, you will also be able to see many of the questions on your applications. Read the essay prompt carefully. This is why I'm going to split this brainstorming into two parts—to go with the "why us" and "why you" types of questions. Of course, since they are both sides of the same coin, you can always easily flip each of these ideas around in order to have it work well for the other type of prompt. For example, a "why us" essay might talk about how interesting the XYZ interdisciplinary project is and how it fits well with your senior project. By contrast, a "why you" essay would take the same idea but flip it to say that you've learned through your senior project how you deeply value an interdisciplinary approach to academics, making you a great fit for this school and its commitment to such work, as evidenced by project XYZ. Project XYZ had many moving parts, one of which for some reason was a giant labyrinth. The school's interesting approach to your future major if you know what that will be or a major that combines several disciplines that appeal to you and fit with your current academic work and interests. How the school handles financial aid and the infrastructure setup for low-income students, and what that means for you in terms of opening doors. A story about how you became interested in the school if you learned about it in an interesting way. Did it host a high school contest you took part in? Feature a visual or performing art that you enjoyed and that you also do? How you overcame an initial disinterest in the school be sure to minimize this first negative impression. Did you do more research? Interact with someone on campus? Learn about the school's commitment to the community? Learn about interesting research being done there? A positive interaction you had with current students, faculty, or staff, as long as this is more than just, "Everyone I met was really nice. Was there a super passionate tour guide? Any information that surprised you? Did something happen to transform your idea about the school or campus life in a good way? The history of the school—but only if it's meaningful to you in some way. Was it founded by someone you admire? Did it take an unpopular but, to you, morally correct stance at some crucial moment in history? An amazing professor you can't wait to learn from. Is there a chemistry professor whose current research meshes with a science fair project you did? A professor whose book on economics finally made you understand the most recent financial crisis? A class that sounds fascinating, especially if it's in a field you want to major in. Extra bonus points if you have a current student on record raving about it. A facility or piece of equipment you can't wait to work in or with, and that doesn't exist in many other places. Is there a specialty library with rare medieval manuscripts? Is there an observatory? A fleet of boats? A required curriculum that appeals to you because it provides a solid grounding in the classics, shakes up the traditional canon, connects all the students on campus in one intellectual project, or is taught in a unique way. Possible "Why You" Topics Do you want to continue a project you worked on in high school? Why will you be a good addition to the team? Have you always been involved in a community service project that's already being done on campus? Write about integrating life on campus with events in the surrounding community. Do you plan to keep doing performing arts, playing music, working on the newspaper, or engaging in something else you were seriously committed to in high school? Discuss how excited you are to join that existing organization. Are you the perfect person to take advantage of an internship program e. Are you the ideal candidate for a study abroad opportunity e. Are you a stand-out match for an undergraduate research project e. Is there something you were deeply involved with that doesn't currently exist on campus? Offer to start a club for it. And I mean a club you aren't going to magically create a new academic department or even a new academic course, so don't try offering that! Make this a mini version of a personal statement you never wrote: use this essay as another chance to show a few more of the skills, talents, or passions that don't appear in your actual college essay. What's the runner-up interest that you didn't write about? What opportunity, program, or offering at the school lines up with it? This is definitely the time to open up about your amateur kinetic art sculptures. Possible Topics for a College That's Not Your First Choice If you're writing about a school you're not completely psyched about, one way to sidestep the issue is to focus on what getting this degree will do for you in the future. How do you see yourself changing existing systems, helping others, or otherwise succeeding? Does it have a vegan, organic, and cruelty-free cafeteria? A relationship with a local farm or garden? De-emphasized fraternity involvement? Strong commitment to environmental issues? Lots of opportunities to contribute to the community surrounding the school? Active tolerance and inclusion for various minority groups? While all colleges will see your Common Application, only the individual colleges will see your additional responses. So each one is different. Colleges can ask all kinds of questions. Some will have one essay while others will have several. Be prepared to write a variety of supplemental essays from short one-line responses to medium size responses to word essays. No matter what the length, each response is a new chance to tell a different story or message about what you will offer a college. In each essay provide a hook, key context information, and then powerful ending. Some of your questions will appear based on what you answer in Member Question about particular majors or merit scholarships. Keep a running track of what you have to write for each prompt based on your Member Question selections. Learn deeply about the personality and reputation of college. Think of what each college values when writing your supplemental essays. If the college is large, and asks a community or diversity question, think how you can make a big campus small. With more performances than days in the year and a large group of talented musicians in the Conservatory of Music, Oberlin is an ideal place for exploring my love of both music and the environment. Understanding the Essay Prompt To understand the strength of the essay, we must first look at the prompt: the admissions officers at Oberlin want you to "explain why Oberlin College will help you grow. A strong "Why This College" essay will make a case for why the school in question is a good fit for the student. The case should be made by connecting facts about the school—unique opportunities, educational values, campus culture, et cetera—with the student's goals, values, and interests. We know that students have access to more information than ever before and that most colleges focus on the classroom experience. If the essay still makes sense once you do a global replace of the school name, you haven't written a good supplemental essay. A Critique of the Supplemental Essay The sample essay certainly succeeds on this front. If we were to substitute "Kenyon College" for "Oberlin College" in the essay, the essay would not make sense.
Example of a Great "Why This College" Essay At this point, it'll be helpful to take a look at a "why us" essay that works and figure out what the author did to create a meaningful answer to this challenging question. Our topics of conversation ranged from Asian geography to efficient movement patterns, and everyone spoke enthusiastically about what they were involved in on campus. I really related essay the guys I met, and I think they represent the passion that Tufts' students have. I can pursue my dream of being a successful entrepreneur by joining the Tufts Entrepreneurs Society, pursuing an Entrepreneurial Leadership minor, and taking part in an up-and-coming computer science program.
Here are some of the good reasons this essay is so effective: Interaction with current students. Keep track of the essays you need to write. Let us help you. The expert college advisors at International College Counselors can make the essays easier by guiding you on what to write and how to write it. For more information on how to best answer the college supplemental essay prompts or with any or all parts of the college admissions process, visit www.
The details in the essay are unique to Oberlin. Demonstrated interest can play a meaningful role in the admissions process, and this applicant has clearly demonstrated that she knows Oberlin well and her interest in the school is sincere.
Let's look at some of the essay's strengths: The college paragraph makes several important points. First of all, we learn that the applicant has visited Oberlin. This may not seem supplement a big deal, but you'd be surprised how many students apply to a large number of colleges based on nothing but the schools' reputations.
This information isn't really specific to Oberlin, but it does show that she has thought about the options available to her. The final good in this college paragraph supplements more specific—the essay is familiar with Oberlin and knows the school's socially progressive history.